Erti kehambaan, hakikat kehidupan

Alhamdulillah segala puji-pujian hanyalah kepadaNya. Setiap nafas yang dikurniakan, setiap langkah tanpa halangan dan setiap nikmat yang tidak terduga nilainya. Lupa Baru sahaja usai assessment paediatric, alhamdulillah walaupun tidak sebaik yang dijangka namun aku sedar ini sapaan dari Yang Maha Esa. Terlalu lalai dengan ilmu dunia terlupa dunia yang lebih hakiki itu. Dugaan ku tidak sebesar mana berbanding sahabat lain pastinya, namun ah, benci dengan hati ini, begitu mudah merasa kecewa, mulut bisa saja berkeluh kesah bagaikan ini penghujung cerita. Astaghfirullah, maafkan aku ya Allah, sering kali aku gagal dalam ujian ini. Sungguh aku hanya hamba yang hina di sisi Mu. Benar janjiNya, akan diuji setiap makhluk yang bernyawa. Moga aku tidak mengalah kerana ini jihadku bukan semata-mata batu loncatan untuk kejayaan dunia. Ingat itu wahai diri, jangan ingat ini penamat segalanya bahkan ia hanya permulaan dalam hidupmu. 30 September 2010 Tarikh adikku berjumpa doktor pakar. Moga Allah ...

'... in travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in years twain was his weaning: (hear the command), "Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: to Me is (thy final) Goal.' (Al-Luqman:14) Indeed the hardship continues until death come knocking on their door. Mother I am amazed how 4 years in the UK made me forget about how much my mum has sacrificed. I do feel that I misses and appreciate her more from the distance however feeling and seeing will never be the same. And my mother, is the only person that I know who is pure in intention and action. Patience is her true companion no matter how bad the situation gets. Unfortunately, I am not as patience as her, which sometime annoys me as people just take her for granted and she still just smile. Since last year tearful event, she has grown stronger. Although I tried her to follow my way to deal with the current situation as I am just like him, she never agrees, she believes action speaks louder than words, anger can b...

The reason why I write is to keep me sane! I need to process all the ideas and thoughts by writing and not because I just simply do it for the sake of this blog, unable to be on the internet for more than two weeks just make me realized that fact more. Final year is here! Alhamdulillah, all praises is to Allah swt. I cannot describe this feeling that I have, looking back 4 years ago, I never thought I would have come this far and it is ONLY by HIS help and guidance. I have been through so many things, being alone and the only few Malaysian Muslim or being with many Muslims; Malaysian and other places. I learnt that whatever it is you need to make sure HE is in your heart and in every action as at the end of the day, HE will be your only companion and judge. I also appreciate the importance to feel belonging, yes! To feel that you are part of something, as Allah has always said men and women are created as pairs, which mean you are not meant to be alone, be it being with your family...