me amazing roommate


I haven't done this for awhile many too long while and now I think I need to start doing what I used love doing which is writing

Do you know what it means to be 30 but still feel like you are a kid? Today I feel the need to share how it feels to be living with your parents at the age of 30 because it is difficult for me that made me wonder do other people feel the same as me? and as I am trying to be a better me, this is an issue I need to improve on.

With the intention of being a good daughter I decided to come back home and stay, to care for them without knowing what I have put myself into :)

It is like having a roommate who is annoying but who you can't ignore unlike if it is your roommate, you can either kick them out or move houses.

They are some one who you have to accept and love for who they really are,
That they make me think how they must have felt when they had me as their new 'roommate' ,  how I use to whine and cry and how they can't get r…

Because life is all about surviving the challenges

Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah

For giving me the chance to breath ....
Where should I start?

Maybe with age I stumbled easily on my words even on my footsteps not forgetting my memory too


This smile hidden a thousand meaning, trying to make up for the time that you have lost is impossible hence what you can only do is to hope for a better tomorrow

I think I have put a lot of time and effort to be a good doctor to my patient and for my own peace of mind, never to think that one day it might come to get me back

People may have many perception to what kind of a doctor I am, or a person I am outside/inside of work, I consider myself a workaholic who loves my patient more than I do myself at times, mistakes I have made, too many to be mentioned here, of course I hope it made me a better doctor.
Certainly this experience has changed me to be a better person who loves being a doctor( although not fully happy to have to work in Malaysian health care knowing there is a better pro…

Making another new chapter in my life

So many times that I said this to myself, to be a better me than the day before and many times I failed so today I decided I need to start writing again so I will not fail again , if that is even possible

Live life with no regrets

I hate shaytan and how good they are at making us thinking about WHAT IF! they are just so good at this game and I am so bad at it that this habit of thinking has become the big China wall that stops me from being happy and live my life to the fullest.

What happens, happened.

Learning to let go is one of the hardest thing to do as well

I make mistakes.

I am not God hence it is normal but what differs is that you learn from the mistake and not to REPEAT it again.
As my job involves people's life I need to admit I am a perfectionist but few times I do make mistake which results in my patient's care and it hurts me badly. Being an MO definitely bears more weight on this shoulder which make me restless at time, the will to do something good can turn to …

Erti kehambaan, hakikat kehidupan


It's been so long since I have written anything in my blog. How time flies and not one second this life has not been meaningful in its own special way. No words could express how 2014 has been one of the most challenging year of my life, just as how Malaysia has gone through all the misfortunate events, I too felt the same way.

 I started writing so I could learnt and become a better person as human is such a forgetful creature, and I am certainly one of those species. Looking back at the things I have written surely give me some strength and faith to this life, and what I am about to write today I hope will make me smile in the future as well, as I have enough tears to shed.

2014, countless blessings in the form of trials were given to me,
having to face it all alone was difficult and now I can imagined how my sister felt back then when I was away, and I hope Lailatulain Abbas you know how it felt for me too.

Allah certainly knows how to call me back whenever i w…

back to the past, written in June 2014

I wish to make a novel out of my life but maybe that is a bit too much so I will just write it here in my blog, just as a reminder for myself to be a better me, to be thankful of each steps and blessing that He has given to me...
i also learnt that this life is full of unexpected things, be it good or bad you can never anticipate what may happen. You do such a well planned but at the end He will decide how things will turn, I have hoped to pass my MRCP part two by this year and travel at least to 2/3 countries never expecting that it will be such this tough ride. I cried but not as much as I thought I should have and I thanked Him for that. I planned so much for this year 2014 as I pray that this life as an MO will be a better life but He planned something better for me... He wants to teach me about what is important in this life, He is giving me a chance of a lifetime :) to care for my only and one MOTHER, so much that I have to sacrifice for this...
financial crisis my career developme…

Give me strength

It make me wonder if i stay would it been better... I did what i did because of them and yet this heart keep on breakiNG.... I KNOW i am not good enough.. .. I tried i failed and i keep on trying but it is never good enough... I see others smiling and genuinely treasuring what they have... Why can't we be like that ? Only He knows what goes through my mind and heart... I wish only for 'keluarga bahagia' but i can only smile in jealousy watching others ooo how i wish.... I pray and i pray.... I know all of these is to purify my intention... And SO Allah please make me strong... As i am growing weaker and weaker, almost on the edge of breaking down... Whatever holds in front me i shall be fine as long as You are with me. And so please guide me... Make me strong... Why must this heart complicate things... Lailatulema abbas just do it...

Mak & E & b'day

Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah

For I am still breathing at the age of 27y/o on the 6th of December 2013, I can never thank Him enough for all the things that He has given me, never once He has disowned me although many times I feel otherwise being a weak servant of His.

Finally, my MO years will start here in Batu Pahat district Johor. Another chapter of my life in my search to find true meaning of this life...

There is only two person in my life who thought the real meaning of Love, being foreign to have a lover's love in which I am not actively searching for one as the love I currently has suffice me. And this year I want to be more and more thankful than before in my heart, my act and word and so I am telling this story....

I learnt that love will make you smile and cry,
It is a cure but can also be a poison,
That it is beautiful when you longed for it,
That yes it is true, distance makes the heart grow fonder,
and a mother's love & father's love can ne…