me amazing roommate

Bismillah...

I haven't done this for awhile many too long while and now I think I need to start doing what I used love doing which is writing

Do you know what it means to be 30 but still feel like you are a kid? Today I feel the need to share how it feels to be living with your parents at the age of 30 because it is difficult for me that made me wonder do other people feel the same as me? and as I am trying to be a better me, this is an issue I need to improve on.

With the intention of being a good daughter I decided to come back home and stay, to care for them without knowing what I have put myself into :)

It is like having a roommate who is annoying but who you can't ignore unlike if it is your roommate, you can either kick them out or move houses.

They are some one who you have to accept and love for who they really are,
That they make me think how they must have felt when they had me as their new 'roommate' ,  how I use to whine and cry and how they can't get rid of me even if they want to.

What I am trying to say here is,

As I grow older, I am seeing the other side of my parents and myself, how I used to treat and look at them 10 years ago and now is completely different, although I am not so sure about how their feelings towards me now. I used to depend on them to tell me what to do and how I should behave but now I have my own preferences and I got easily irritated when they are doing what they used to do before.

I love going to nice cafes, while my roommate like the mamak stall
I love to sleep all day long while my roommate become amazed at how much I can sleep,
I love travelling and try new things, while my roommate stick to the same old routined and refused to change
I love things clean and in order, while my roommate like things messy

We argue, we quarrel and sometimes we cry and laugh
But at the end of the day, I have to keep in mind that they are not just my roommate but they are both the most important person in my life,
A mother who has sacrificed her whole life and time just to raise me and made me who I am,
Someone who always put myself before herself,
A father who has tried his best to provide all that I need and protect me from all the cruelty of this world,

These are the things which I sometime always forget just because I am not a kid anymore.
I have this idea that because I am an adult no one can told me off , I have my own personality and never want to be somebody else but me,
But know this my adult self,

your roommate now, will be the most lovable and reliable roommate you could have in your life, like ever!
how lucky you are that many of your adult friends do not have the chance that you have now and plant a garden full of deeds,
and one day when your roommate leave this worldly life you can never find a replacement worth their worth,

and so Lailatulema Abbas,

be more understanding of your roommate,
enjoy being a kid while you can,
once in a while it is time for you to let them be the kid,
let them whine, sulk or hates you just like how you were before,
and then, make up laugh and love again

just because when you love it will hurt even more then you know you really loved :)



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